Thoughts from here and there…Reflections for a Father’s Day
A young pastor was visiting one of his church families. The father launched into a long lament about how difficult it was to be a good parent in our high-pressure, high-speed society. Finally the pastor said, “You are right, but there is only one thing harder than being a parent today, and that is being a child.”
The young daughter, who had been listening immediately responded, “You’re right!”
It’s tough being a father. It has always been tough to be a father. Fatherhood does not end when our children become adults. You may decide to relate to your children on an adult-to-adult basis, but you never stop being a father. You continue to be a fatherly role model all the rest of your life.
As a pastor I truly know how tough it is. Very often, when my children were small, I served a three or four point charge. One year I drove 60,000 miles attempting to provide pastoral services and care to three churches in the lower third of the Sate of Vermont. Most of the time the children were in bed asleep before I got home. I still took a day off a week for family activities.
I have tried to do a better job with our grandchildren. On occasion Helga and I have had one of them stay with us for a night or two. We have done the usual grandparent things: trips to the zoo, to the Betty Brinn Children’s Museum, McDonald’s or Chuckie Cheese. On one occasion we decided to take Danissa to Karl Ratsch’s Restaurant. Helga explained a little what our granddaughter would find in the restaurant.
One of the most satisfying and rewarding experiences has been to read a story at bedtime. To say goodnight with a kiss, and “I love you.”
It is important to stay connected. In a scene from the summer 1991 movie “The Doctor”: William Hurt portrays a cynical, successful heart surgeon whose life attitude is turned around by his own bout with cancer. When he comes home unexpectedly in the middle of the day to be with his family, his wife calls to their young son playing outside, “Come in and say hello to your father.” The boy races into the room without even noticing his father standing at the other end. Automatically his son picks up the phone, “Hi Dad…hello, hello…” Then turning to his mother, he says, “Well, Mom, we must have got cut off…” Stay engaged and stay connected. It’s worth every minute of it.